From Barnesy to Farnesy to sparklin' new Cher, these Xmas choons bring the cheer!

Cher, Christmas (2023)

We described Cher’s first single from this album, the original DJ Play a Christmas Song, as "Believe in a Santa hat” – but the rest of the icon’s first-ever official Chrissy album rolls around in all sorts of genres just like a happy pork roast, rarely losing step.

It primarily serves up classic rock ’n’ roll befitting guests like Stevie Wonder (who else could deliver What Christmas Means to Me with such cheery abandon?) and Darlene Love, on whose Letterman-tradition gem Christmas (Baby, Please Come Home) Cher really flings her vocal loose (especially around that adorable tenor sax).

Unexpected lo-fi R’n’B cut Drop Top Sleigh Ride featuring Compton rapper Tyga (”Shake that thang like a snow globe”) reimagines Santa’s vehicle as a pimped-out convertible, and boasts the chorus refrain, ”Hey! Are you ready to roll/ From LA to the North Pole?”, and Home – with Mr Christmas himself, Michael Bublé – is a soft, woolly blankie of a ballad.

BEST BOP: On Santa Baby, we get to hear the saucy lounge jazz sensibility Cher’s so good at, right up close and personal.

Various Artists, Just the Hits: Christmas (2019)

Despite the cover art’s names leaning way towards the commercial pop slice of things, this is actually a well-rounded collection of standards and originals from all over the time and genre spectrum.

We head deepest down memory lane with Bing Crosby’s 1947 version of White Christmas, then trip into the ’50s and ’60s with Bobby Helms’ 1957 hit Jingle Bell Rock, Burl Ives’ 1965 lollipop A Holly Jolly Christmas, and offerings from Brenda Lee (Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree) and Ella Fitzgerald (Let it Snow! Let it Snow! Let it Snow!).

The ’70s and ’80s are repped by Marvin Gaye and ABBA before quintessential ’90s cats Sheryl Crow and Bryan Adams appear (and God, does Adams’ earnest rasp suit sentimental holiday fare).

In the post-millennium pop camp, we get those tracks that start out sugarplum-sweet before production hikes them up into sassier territory (see: Ariana Grande’s chintz-ribboned Santa Tell Me, S Club’s Perfect Christmas) and the ones that fang straight outta the gate with liberal cheer (Girls Aloud’s I Wish It Could Be Christmas Every Day, and the perfectly-cast Hanson with Run Rudolph Run).

Genuinely something for absolutely everyone.

BEST BOP: Do not even think about missing this collection’s astonishing a capella version of Silent Night by R’n’B balladeer darlings Boyz II Men.

Jimmy Barnes, Blue Christmas (Expanded Edition, 2023)

Last year, a full 31 sun-laps after the Tin Lids’ Christmas collection, Barnesy finally unleashed his own set of seasonal songs - and this year, he's embiggened the party!

For the Blue Christmas collection, he’s put the scream away, preferring to croon classics such as Jingle Bell Rock, Santa Claus is Coming to Town, Silent Night, Let it Snow! and Little Drummer Boy. The new edition sees the addition of two wonderful new tracks: O Holy Night and If Santa Forgets.

Yep, this is not an album of rarities; Barnesy is rockin’ around the tree with a set of Christmas crowd-pleasers. The result is fun for kids “from 1 to 92."

As Barnesy points out, even if you don’t have enough money to buy all the presents you want, you’ve always got songs to sing. And when you’re surrounded by family, that’s all you need.

BEST BOP: If we were gonna go Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree with anyone, it'd have to be ol' mate Jimmy.

John Farnham and Olivia Newton-John, Friends for Christmas (2016)

This friendship might be tinged with melancholy – even the most precious camaraderie must come to an end sometime in this life – but whoa, the joy is palpable all over this irresistible record from two homegrown greats.

Livvy and Johnny are having a ball on Friends for Christmas, and the genuine, cheeky affection in their friendship is as potent as Ella and Louis’. The two do-si-do around one another with delightful swagger right from the get-go, and the arrangements are gorgeously old-school orchestral: warm horns, sweet woodwind, harp, and bells. There’s just the right amount of swing to vintage toetappers Santa Claus Is Coming to Town and Winter Wonderland.

For the real punch in the feels, go straight to Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas; the poignancy these two maestros evoke will have you dabbing your eyes.

BEST BOP: The besties’ maximalist rendition of Hark! The Herald Angels Sing is especially stirring for its harmonies as well as the moments when Olivia and John sing in unison – both following exactly the same melody. The effect is more soul-moving than any polyphonic acrobatics.

Paul Kelly, Paul Kelly’s Christmas Train (2021)

Paul Kelly doesn’t do things by halves. Two years ago, a full 25 years after his Christmas classic How to Make Gravy, he delivered his first Christmas album, a 22-song set that’s epic, educational, festive, and fun.

All are welcome on Kelly’s Christmas Train, probably the most eclectic Christmas collection ever released.

Waleed Aly reads a piece from the Quran. Lior leads a beautiful version of the traditional Jewish song Shalom Aleichem. Marlon Williams sings O Holy Night in Māori. Kelly records a couple of new Aussie crackers – Casey Bennetto’s Swing Around the Sun and Chris and Wes Harrington’s Christmas. Alice Keath sings a verse of Silent Night in German. And before you know it, Kelly and Alma Zygier are wondering, What Are You Doing New Year’s Eve?

There’s even a new version of Gravy. All aboard!

BEST BOP: Sorry, friends and neighbours, but it’s impossible to choose. Jump aboard the Christmas Train and take your pick!